Boredom
by ZaKai
Summary: Ed is bored and he wants Roy to entertain him. :RoyEd, Oneshot:


**A/N:** This oneshot doesn't exactly have a point, but is more like a snapshot of a moment in Roy and Ed's relationship.

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**Boredom**

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Roy heard the door to his office open and glanced up briefly before looking back at his work. His brain made a mental note that it was Ed who had slipped into his office, but didn't dwell on it.

"I'm bored..." he heard Ed say.

"Uh huh..." Roy muttered as he thought about the documents in front of him.

There was a long moment of silence before he was aware of Ed leaning against his desk. "Did you hear me?"

"Uh huh..." Roy mumbled again, then blinked when Ed's face appeared over the documents.

"I'm bored," Ed said flatly.

Roy moved his gaze along Ed's body. His knees were lifted and the heels of his boots were pressed precariously against the edge of the front of his desk to keep his back from arching up off the polished wood.

He glanced back down into Ed's upside-down face, and said blandly, "You may not realize this, but I was actually doing something with the papers you're now laying on."

"Do something with _me_ instead," Ed demanded.

Roy almost said something about doing something _to_ Ed, but he held his tongue. The last time they'd started getting 'touchy-feely' in the office, they'd almost been caught. Since then he'd made a vow to himself that he would remain perfectly professional while at work.

"I will."

"You will?" Ed said hopefully.

"After we get off work," Roy added. Ed's face fell in disappointment. "Why don't you go to the library and do some research?"

Ed shook his head at the suggestion. "I'm not allowed to leave headquarters outside work hours without a 'higher ranking officer', remember? Gonna be that way for the next two weeks..."

Ah yes... Roy had forgotten about that. "You have no one else to blame for that, but yourself."

"Oh, shut up..." Ed said with a frown. "It's not like I _knew_ it would start a food fight... Seriously, Hakuro has no sense of humor..."

Roy smirked slightly. "I think the general has a right to eat in the cafeteria without being hit with food."

Ed opened his mouth, then closed it, looking a little sheepish, but still not able to keep the smile from forming on his face. "Okay, okay... but now I can't do _anything_! I'm dying of boredom."

"Surely such an intelligent and imaginative alchemist such as yourself can find _something_ to occupy his time," Roy said as he pulled the paper he'd been looking at from under Ed's head.

"No. I can't. I _never_ do _anything_ in this building that applies to my job."

Roy set the paper on top of Ed's face and started looking for where he'd left off. "Except for annoy me," he pointed out.

Ed blew on the paper until it slid off his face, then scowled up at Roy. "Pay attention to me."

"No," Roy said, grabbing the paper and putting it back on Ed's face.

"I guess I _could_ always go hang out in the bathroom and jerk off all day," Ed mused. "Of course, even though I'm a teenager, I can only cum so many times a day. I just might not have the energy to do anything with you in the evenings..."

Roy pulled the paper off Ed's face and looked wryly down at him. Ed grinned at him in return, knowing he'd won the battle—one step toward winning the war.

"Kiss me," Ed said smugly. Roy glanced up at the door from beyond Ed's knees. "Oh come on! No one's going to come in."

Returning his gaze to Ed, Roy leaned in and kissed Ed on the forehead. Scowling, Ed said, "Not there."

"It's what you get for not being very specific," Roy said, a small smile creeping across his face.

Ed's eyes narrowed a little, then he said, "Press your Labia superfluos entafada and Labium inferius against my Labia superfluos entafada and Labium inferius. How's that for specific? Or would you like me to give you the mathematical formula for how much pressure you should use?"

"Smart ass," Roy said, leaning down and kissing Ed's lips.

As he pulled away, Roy saw Ed smile. "Let's lock the door to your office and—"

"Not a chance," Roy said, giving Ed another quick kiss.

"Prude," Ed said with a pout.

"Be sure to bring some research with you tomorrow," Roy said.

Ed rolled his eyes. "That doesn't help me with _today_." There was a pause, then, "I know, I'll take a nap."

"Good idea," Roy said, then scowled when Ed closed his eyes, turned his body, and curled into himself. "Not on my desk!" Roy snapped, then shook his head when Ed started to snicker.

It was then that Roy realized that there was no way Ed was going to let up. With a sigh, Roy stood up. "Okay, grab your coat. Let's get out of here."

"Alright!" Ed said, easily jumping off the desk.

Putting all his paperwork together in a folder, Roy tucked it under his arm to do later that night after Ed had fallen asleep. He smiled as Ed pulled open the door and looked impatiently at him; then with a touch on Ed's back, Roy guided him out of the office.

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I hope you enjoyed. Thanks for reading!

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**Comments are always welcome. :)**


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